I am reminding myself that we aren't doing this to satisfy our selfish desires. We are faithful to the journey of adoption because God is so in love with these children. We are committed because we love Him so much that we will take as many children as He wants us to. So this really isn't about me at all.
As I sit in sessions and workshops the truth that just seems to be resounding is that when it's hard I CANNOT GIVE UP!!
This isn't just about adoption it overflows into ministry and parenting. When the going gets tough in ministry you CANNOT just throw your arms up and walk away.
The same is true with parenting... for example when my beautiful little boy throws himself to the ground and screams NOOOOO!!!!!! In that moment my human response would be "ok get out of here" but I CANNOT run away from parenting.
What has hit me is that when adoption isn't going the way I want .... I can't throw myself on the ground and scream NOOOO!!!
Isn't it funny how my sin is often the same as my 4 year olds. Instead of crying over the fact that I can't have ice cream, I am crying over the fact that my Baby isn't here. Both are just as sinful.... what I would explain to Jaxon is that he can't have ice cream right now because he needs something good for him first. So then this Mommy sits almost ashamed that I am trying to tell God when I need something. I chuckle as I write that. When I think of it that way I really just need to shut up and let Him have control.
GAH!!!
Well. All you who read this blog... I start out with the plan to write something to encourage others but usually end up learning about myself and what I need to work on. teehee! Thanks for reading.
This makes me smile....just last night I was sitting with 2 dear friends and we were discussing what we think God is trying to teach us. All three of us have VERY different stories but all of us came back to the conclusion that God is teaching us to trust HIS plan...that He does have one, and we are NOT in control! And we must learn to TRUST HIS PLAN! Hurts sometimes!!!
ReplyDeleteThanks for being so honest about yourself and in the process making us sit back and think. We all need to make an honest evaluation of our life. From there we need to make changes, because God has had a plan for our life and He is carrying it out even now.
ReplyDelete